


Bloodsport

by Vioxxin



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-01
Updated: 2015-10-31
Packaged: 2018-04-18 10:44:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4703144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vioxxin/pseuds/Vioxxin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hide is tasked to serve the strange regular at Anteiku, and receives an eccentric admirer.</p>
<p>[In which Kaneki is the One-Eyed King, and Hide is the oblivious human who gets entangled with him.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. If I Break Rank

**Author's Note:**

> I’m not familiar enough with Aogiri to be writing this stuff and yet here I am. ●︿● Sorry for all the self-indulgence you are about to face.
> 
> ~~srsly im sorry.~~

 

_V cares little for weaklings, much less defectors blinded by their own heart. To have betrayed everything in the name of love is foolish, and easy to take advantage of._

_For having betrayed everything in the name of love, they kill the one he loves the most._

_For having defected from his position in the organization, they take away his son as replacement._

_They name him ‘Ken’. Not in hope, but in demand._

 

* * *

 

Ken is not fond of his name.

 

_Healthy and strong_ … it is a reminder of his purpose. The fact that he is not allowed to be a child.

 

He prefers the one his caretaker gifts him when they are alone.

 

“I’ll call you Kaneki,” Banjou says, “It means _golden tree_. Firm, but life-giving, and full of possibilities.”

 

It gives him hope that death is not the only future he is set to face.

 

* * *

 

The mask they give him is a mockery of his heritage.

 

A red heart sits over his right eye, stark against its white surface. It stands for the love that bore him, the beautiful, unconditional bond that led to his birth.

 

It fails to hide the monstrous grin on his face, fails to detract from the mark of death that sits on his other eye.

 

He is born of love, but he is still a monster.

 

* * *

 

Kaneki is only ten when he makes his first kill.

 

His target is a human man, dark-haired and strong-jawed with piercing eyes and a fierce mouth. He cares little for Kaneki’s age, not when he has his own child to protect, huddled away somewhere in the house after he’s been told to escape.

 

“What? Do they think so lowly of me that they decided to just send a kid?” The man taunts. Despite his words, he swings at Kaneki like he is dealing with a true fighter. Kaneki whispers movements, tricks and trades underneath his breath as he dodges, but his body moves like fighting is the only dance it has ever known.

 

It is a must that he performs it well.

 

“That’s not the case,” he says, grunting as the man pierces his side with the quinque. It disorients him, and other children might have turned and ran, but Kaneki is not like any other child.

 

“In fact,”

 

The man watches as the gash in his abdomen stitches itself up in mere seconds, and the distraction is enough for Kaneki to ram all four of his kagune into his chest.

 

“It’s quite the opposite.”

 

The man gurgles, blood spilling out of his mouth in rivers as Kaneki forcefully pulls out his heart.

 

He has never been more thankful for being a mutant.

 

* * *

 

“You’re not a mutant,” Banjou had told him, carding his fingers through Kaneki’s dark hair. Training had just ended, and the responsibility of caring for Kaneki’s mental health had once again fallen to him. It is a task he eagerly carries, one his gentle heart allows him to do without compromising the majority of his virtues. Sometimes Kaneki wonders why he is even working here.

 

Still, he adores him, his shield.

 

“Ok,” Kaneki had replied. It is not an agreement. One man’s words is not enough to combat a hundred’s, Kaneki thinks. But if saying that is enough to make Banjou happy, then he’ll gladly smile and pretend to believe it.

 

* * *

 

“Papa?”

 

Startled, Kaneki turns around at the sound of the voice and sees a kid, far younger than him. Doe-eyed and terrified, Kaneki recognizes him as the son his target had been so adamant to protect.

 

Leave no witnesses, V had said.

 

“P-Papa!” the kid cries again, stuttering in his tears at the sight. Kaneki’s rinkaku glows behind him like fox tails made of blood, and the room is lit in an eerie shade of red, “Papa! Papa!”

 

He doesn’t even need his kagune for this. All he needs to do is snap his neck.

 

“Wake up! Wake up!” The child sobs, running past Kaneki and straight to the man’s cooling corpse. He grabs the man’s face with chubby hands and blubbers at the blood that seeps from his mouth, at the brilliant streaks of red smeared across his face.

 

_He’s distracted_ , Kaneki thinks. _It would be so **easy**..._

The boy abruptly looks up, and meets Kaneki’s eyes through his mask. He looks back, prepared to face the fear, the anger he is expecting to see, but neither of them are present.

 

Instead, he finds grief, and an overwhelming force starts to weigh on his chest.

 

“Why?”

 

Kaneki steps back, bile rising in his throat, and flees.

 

* * *

 

The punishment he receives is enough to erase the guilt from his mind.

 

Banjou holds him close after the ordeal, whispers that he had made the right choice.

 

Kaneki wonders.

 

* * *

 

Six years pass.

 

Kaneki leans against a dumpster in a deserted alley and waits for his wounds to heal. His mask is shattered a few feet away from him, and he can feel the blood that trails from his temples.

 

His mind is dizzy, ridden with pain, and he guesses it’s the reason why she was able to sneak up on him.

 

“Are you alright?!”

 

He gasps in shock and writhes, pain lacing up his side at the movement. Hands, soft and slender, cup his face and he stares into dark, melancholic eyes.

 

“I’ll help you, ok?”

 

Weak. He is too weak to fight her.

 

* * *

 

She cares for his wounds with a gentleness that he is unaccustomed to. For all the softness of his heart, Banjou’s large hands are unable to match her own, and Kaneki warms at the smile that she graces him with.

 

‘Could you care for me?’ Kaneki thinks, ‘Even if you know what I am?’

 

The window is open when she returns, and a cold, biting wind is all that he leaves.

 

* * *

 

When he sees her again, Kaneki allows himself to believe it is fate.

 

“You look much better now!” she laughs, a gentle hand in his hair.

 

He swallows the blood that lingers on his tongue and clasps her hand in his own.

 

* * *

 

“I’m so happy you’ve found love,” Banjou tells him as he recounts their encounters in hushed tones, wary of eyes and ears in the walls.

 

“Love,” Kaneki echoes.

 

He is in love.

 

* * *

 

Her face is beautiful, even in gray, Kaneki thinks.

 

He grips the picture in his hand, chokes down a scream at the words that are scribbled behind it, daunting.

 

‘Kill her.’

 

* * *

 

She is crying. Screaming.

 

“How could you?! How could you?!”

 

He hadn’t told her because-

 

“I didn’t know! Why did I- Oh God, why?”

 

He was afraid-

 

“I should never have helped you!”

 

That V was right.

 

“Monster!”

 

 

* * *

 

“You let her escape,”

 

Kaneki pants, and his fingers twitch.

 

“I did,” he replies.

 

A snip, and three fingers fall on the floor.

 

“Because you love her?”

 

His scream dies out.

 

“I do,” he chokes.

 

Five more needles are jammed in his chest. It scalds.

 

“You’re a fool.”

 

Banjou’s lifeless body lies across him, mangled and torn.

 

“I am,” he cries.

 

“And all for nothing,”

 

“What?”

 

Something is dropped on his lap. Kaneki looks down, and sees her head, face frozen in an endless scream.

 

Static starts to buzz in his head.

 

“You should know better than to think you can ever be loved.”

 

He snaps.

 

* * *

 

Ken idly licks at the blood on his fingers, a crown of red draped on his white, white hair as he sits on a throne of flesh and bones.

 

“From this point on, you answer to me.”

 

* * *

 

“Pleeeease, Nagachika-kun? We really, really need you!”

 

Hide chuckles, scratching his head, “Aw man, senpai. You really don’t have to do that. I’ll be happy to help!”

 

Koma looks up at him in surprise, “Wait, really? Aren’t you busy?”

 

Hide grins and shakes his head, “College has been good to me this week, honestly, so I’ve got a lot of time to spare. And besides, it’d go against my values to just leave you and Irimi-san here to slave away while Touka-chan sits on her butt all da-ouch!”

 

Touka grunts, “So says the guy who was probably going to spend the rest of his weekend gorging on junk food if he didn’t have work to do. Unlike you, I’m actually going to get some studying done while I still can.”

 

Koma rubs his head sympathetically as Hide whines pitifully, but Touka only turns up her nose on him and throws a uniform at his head, “Just go change! It’s bad enough that we have to let the customers see your ugly mug all day, so like hell are we going to let you out in those rags!”

 

“Why is she always so mean to me?” Hide sighs, a teasing note in his voice that Koma easily catches and laughs at.

 

“Because you keep provoking her, that’s why,” He rolls his eyes, pushing Hide into the staff room, “She’s right though. Go change! I still need to go back and help Irimi, you know.”

 

“Oh right, sorry!” Hide winces, “I’ll do my best!”

 

* * *

 

Despite her words, Koma knows Touka thinks Hide would do a great job as a waiter. He is friendly, observant, and an efficient worker, all ideal traits in a server.

 

He also knows she doesn’t actually think he’s ugly.

 

Hide leaves a table of high school girls giggling and staring at him, effortlessly listing down an overly-complicated order that Koma is unsurprised to find he memorized. At his nod, Hide immediately darts over to Irimi, carefully taking a tray in his hand and gliding over to a table to cheerfully greet a petite old woman. She chuckles at his attentions, pleased at his politeness and charm, and regretfully waves him away when it is clear she has her order.

 

“Honestly,” Koma mutters to himself.

 

“I can’t think of anyone that kid couldn’t charm.”

 

* * *

 

“Nagachika-kun, would you mind taking this to table number eight?”

 

“Of course!” Hide replies. He reaches over to take the tray but pauses when Irimi gently grabs his hand, “Irimi-san?”

 

Irimi bites her lip, “Before you go, I have to warn you. This customer can be quite... eccentric.”

 

“Um, okay?” Hide blinks, “Is this customer some sort of psychopath or something? Does he kill small animals for fun?”

 

“Ah, no. He is actually quite famous. He works as an editor for Takatsuki Sen. Have you heard of her?”

 

“I think? Um, my Lit professor might have mentioned her in class.”

 

“Yes, well. He is often credited to be part of her success. It is said she also finds great inspiration from him.”

 

“That’s cool,” Hide grins, “Sounds interesting. Now I really wanna go meet him!” He slides out of her grip and turns back to the main room, already darting between tables to the other side of the cafe.

 

“Be careful!” Irimi calls out after him.

 

“What’s the worst that can happen?” Hide laughs.

  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

* * *

 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Long fingers curl around his wrist, a vice on his hand.

 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Hideyoshi-kun.”

 

The man’s voice is velvet and sin.

 

“My name is Hayate Naoki.”

 

Caught in those eyes, he feels like prey.

 

“Stay with me for a bit, won’t you?”


	2. I Will Wait

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im not even joking guys, this chapter was so freaking hard to write for some reason. it went through so many revisions and yet???? what is this even???

 

_Once upon a time there was a dear little girl who was loved by everyone who looked at her…_

  


* * *

 

The rush starts at an unusual time in the morning.

 

Irimi holds a cup in her hand, gently wiping it clean, when people start to swarm the shop. In minutes, the tables are filled with the busy chatter of couples and strangers, and she finds herself in constant motion, moving from tables to the counter and kitchen.

 

Though Koma tries his best to assist her, it becomes clear to them that it will not be enough. She thinks, regrettably, that they will have to call in Touka after all.

 

"Please forgive us. We would have liked to avoid disturbing your studies," The manager says kindly. Touka nods, glumly resigned, "But unfortunately-"

 

The door to the back of the shop opens, and Hide's voice drifts into the kitchen.

 

"I'm back," he calls out. Koma makes a triumphant sound, his mouth open wide, and bumps his fist into his hand.

 

"I've got it!" he crows, "Why don't we just ask Nagachika to help out?"

 

"Don't be ridiculous. He's just a delivery boy," Touka huffs.

 

"He's a pretty fast learner. He can do it!" Koma argues.

 

"It would be better for you too Touka," Irimi says, "You could return to your studies."

 

"They're right," The manager replies with a smile, "It will be alright Touka. Hide-kun is rather astute. He will be able to do it."

 

"Does he even have the time?" Touka continues fiercely, "The guy's some sort of med student isn't he?"

 

"Nursing," Koma supplies, "But I remember him telling me earlier that he didn't have anything to do this night, so maybe he can help out!"

 

"Whatever," Touka relents, "Go ask."

 

"I think he'll do a great job Touka-chan. Don't worry about it," Irimi soothes.

 

"Never said he wouldn't." Touka mumbles.

 

* * *

 

"I'll be back with your order soon, ok?"

 

In a rare moment, Anteiku remains bustling with customers. Irimi smiles behind the counter as she watches Hide coo at a bleary-eyed student sitting by the entrance, their table laden with heavyset books.

 

For a brief moment, she feels a tiny prick of jealousy.

 

"One black coffee please," Hide calls out to her. He grins, "Oh and uh, it's on me."

 

"How sweet," Irimi teases.

 

"Hey now, what do you think of me? I'll let you know I have nothing but respectable intentions in mind!"

 

"I'm sure you do." She means it.

 

She watches him curiously as he takes the cup to the student. They quietly murmur what she assumes is thanks as Hide whispers something back with a snicker. He hovers over them until the student perks up and laughs loudly at something Hide says. Hide bows and leaves them with a flourish as they continue chuckling, cheeks flushed.

 

"Man! Are you guys putting something different in the drinks lately? I've never seen this place get so busy!" Hide jokes, crossing his arms on top of the counter.

 

"I suppose we just have that certain charm," Irimi giggles.

 

* * *

 

_The wolf thought to himself: 'What a tender young creature! What a nice plump mouthful...'_

  


* * *

 

“I would like him to be my server.”

 

Irimi smiles politely, feels the corner of her lips strain and twitch. She looks down, heart pounding, and stares down the wolf that sits before her with dark hair and piercing eyes.

 

"It wouldn't be much trouble now, would it?" Naoki asks.

 

_With you, it would._

"Of course not, sir," she mutters, "He'll be with you shortly."

 

* * *

 

_Little girls, this seems to say_

_Never stop upon your way._

 

* * *

 

_His hand is so cold,_ Hide thinks. Fear and unease bloom in his chest and he shivers as the skin of his wrist grows red under the man’s touch, but he resists the urge to forcefully pull it away.

 

_‘He’s a regular, Hide, and a pretty rich and famous one too apparently, so don’t screw this up.’_

He smiles shakily, “I’m sorry sir. I’d love to stay and chat, but we’re still really busy so I can’t-”

 

“Nagachika, you can take your break now!” Koma’s voice echoes from the back of the shop, and Hide’s shoulders fall.

 

Naoki’s smile is small and triumphant as he loosens his grip.

 

“Come sit with me,” he cooes, patting the seat beside him.

 

Hide hesitates, “Um-”

 

Naoki smirks, lifts a finger to his lips.

 

“I promise I won’t bite.”

 

* * *

 

From afar, the bouquet looks like it is made up of paper flowers. Lightly brushing the back of her hand against it, she finds that she’s wrong.

 

They're strange, but beautiful, colored so vividly in crimson shades that speak of an intent she isn’t sure she approves of.

 

“He’s not a girl,” Touka says. Despite her words, she tucks her hand beneath their heads, bowed by the weight of their own petals, and lifts them gently to her chest.

 

Naoki idly swirls the spoon in his cup and regards her.

 

“I think it’s rather shallow to believe only a woman could appreciate that sort of gift.”

 

“Most guys aren’t like your ex. He won’t even know what this is called.”

 

“Do you?” he asks.

 

She pauses.

 

“They look like roses. But they’re not.”

 

“They’re not.” he smiles, imperious.

 

She wants to punch him.

 

Naoki turns his head away, takes a sip of the coffee that has long gone cold, “It won’t matter. He’ll find out about it.”

 

“What makes you think I’m just going to listen to you and give this to him?” Touka asks.

 

He hides his smile behind his cup.

 

“Because you wouldn’t want anybody in this shop to get hurt.”

 

* * *

 

When Hide shows up to start his shift, Touka is there to shove a bouquet under his nose.

 

“Why Touka-chan! I always knew you had feelings for me!” he croons, eyes wide as he places a hand on his chest in dramatic surprise.

 

Touka sneers, “They’re not from me, asswipe.” she replies, already walking away.

 

“Then who-?”

 

The door shuts.

 

Hide looks down, confused.

 

“What are these, anyway?”

 

Well, the bouquet is kind of pretty. The petals are soft, and a pleasant smell wafts from their folds. He rubs one between his finger, and suddenly feels something pointed hit his hand.

 

“Ouch! What-?”

 

It’s a card.

 

[They are called Ranunculus.]

 

* * *

 

_Never trust a stranger -friend;_

_No one knows how it will end._

 

* * *

 

“How often does he come here?” Hide asks Koma one afternoon. He is leaning over the bar, watching as Koma cleans glasses, and puffs his cheeks in impatience when Koma only starts whistling.

 

“Why are you so keen to know?” Koma finally asks.

 

Hide sighs, and gestures dramatically to the large stack of yellow tulips beside them.

 

Koma chuckles, “I don’t see what you’re complaining about. We get free deco.”

 

“It’s creepy. He’s creepy,” Hide complains.

 

“Then why did you stay when you first met him? Irimi told me she warned you about him.”

 

“Well it’s not like I could just tell him off willy-nilly,” Hide remarks, jumping up to sit over the counter. If Touka had been there, he would have gotten his ass beat, but Koma only leans over beside him to listen, “Besides... something told me it wouldn’t be a good idea if I didn’t listen to him.”

 

Koma hums. Hide looks down and finds him staring straight ahead, a puzzling emotion in the curve of his lips.

 

“You have some pretty great instincts, Nagachika-kun.”

 

* * *

 

He feels his stare even before he meets his eyes.

 

Hide is not on duty today. He walks into Anteiku purely to visit, and maybe spend his time studying and observing all the other customers, but this is a decision he quickly regrets when Naoki comes to sit in front of him.

 

“You look as radiant as ever,” is the line that greets him. At once, Hide remembers the ranunculus bouquet, remembers their meaning.

 

He laughs, and raises his book.

 

“I didn’t know you were coming in today, Naoki-san.” he says. He sees Touka walk around in the corner of his eye, but she seems set on ignoring the both of them.

 

“Would you have gone somewhere else if you knew?” Naoki wonders.

 

“I liked the tulips,” Hide says instead. Two of the blooms sit on their table in a slender vase, one of many that decorated Anteiku’s tables. Naoki reaches up to touch one and brushes his nose against it.

 

“I’m glad,” he whispers. Hide is thankful he doesn’t bring up the subject change, “They hold the beauty of your smile.”

 

Hide laughs and lifts his book higher until his blush is hidden from sight.

 

* * *

 

_As you're pretty, so be wise;_

_Wolves may lurk in every guise._

* * *

 

“Aren’t you bothered?” Hide asks. Once again, he takes up a shift as a waiter as Anteiku blooms with laughter around him.

 

“By what?” Naoki asks.

 

“It’s pretty noisy in here lately. Don’t you wanna work on that somewhere quieter? Somewhere with more-” Hide flicks his wrist, “Space?”

 

Petunias grace the tables around them.

 

“You’re here,” Naoki answers, “That’s all I need.”

 

* * *

 

They meet on his run in a stroke of luck.

 

Hide shudders and sniffs, letting out a little sneeze as he wipes away the raindrops that are trailing down his face. His clothes cling to him like a second skin and he feels ridiculously pathetic.

 

Naoki holds an umbrella over his head.

 

"For someone so clever, you don't care much for checking the weather do you?"

 

Hide has grown used to the teasing tone that accompanies these words.

 

But he is not used to the warm affection that simmers in his chest when he hears them.

 

“I see you came prepared,” he chuckles weakly. Naoki holds out flowers like numerous tiny suns, and gently places them in his bike’s basket. Even Hide, with his limited yet growing knowledge on botany, can recognize them as daffodils.

 

“I don’t need them now,” Naoki smiles.

 

* * *

 

_Handsome they may be, and kind,_

_Gay and charming- never mind!_

 

* * *

 

“We’re under attack!”

 

Cursing, Hide crawls under the thick plumes of smoke that fills the CCG hallways. Although he is a civilian, there is no one left in the floor to help him.

 

_'No one that's not already dead anyway,'_ he thinks.

 

A damp red cloth is tied around his face to ward off the smoke, but it is clear by his throbbing head that it will not be enough.

 

_'I have to get out of here!'_

He stands up when he reaches the hallway and scopes for the end that isn’t bristling with heat. Before he can turn, screaming fills the halls and he stops, lurching back when a body flies past him and hits the other wall at an astonishing speed.

 

Hide slaps a hand over his mouth when it slides down, nothing more but a pile of gore.

 

He backs away with the intent to run, but freezes when someone grabs him from behind and spins him around to face them.

 

He is met by a mask with a large, lipless grin, and a single burning eye.

 

_‘Wow grandmother. What big teeth you have…’_ Hide thinks dazedly as he faints.

 

* * *

 

_Now, as then, tis simple truth:_

**_Sweetest tongue has sharpest tooth._ **

  


* * *

 

“Why did you save him?”

 

Ken undoes his mask and breathes out, relieved. Below him, the CCG burns in a fiery blaze, hardly tempered by the snow that falls from the sky and mixes in the white of his hair.

 

He lets the question hang in the air as he raises his finger to his mouth, his tongue flicking out to lick away the blood that sits at the tip, and smirks.

 

“He intrigues me.”

 

* * *

 

_“The wolf is carnivore incarnate and he's as cunning as he is ferocious; once he's had a taste of flesh then nothing else will do.”_

― Angela Carter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~~i can practically see the question marks popping over your heads~~
> 
>  
> 
> This chapter is dedicated to macrauchenia and buttfulmavinness for their stories “Beam” and “Flowers of the Moon” respectively. Those stories largely inspired this chapter, so please check it out! :)
> 
> _Flower Meanings:_  
>  ranunculus - you are radiant with charm  
> (touka mistaking it for) roses - love, gratitude  
> yellow tulips - there's sunshine in your smile  
> petunias - your presence soothes me  
> daffodils - the sun is always shining when i’m with you  
>   
> p.s: this story is now available in tumblr (vioxxin) along with sun seekers, in case anyone prefers to read there. :) (also on ffn haha). ya'll can head over there and send me some hidekane prompts too if you want! i'd love to read more headcanons! ~~look at that shameless self-advertisement~~


	3. I'm Too Young

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> even if it doesn't look like it, i persevered on these for so many hours, i can’t even tell if it’s good anymore. please have mercy on my soul. QvQ
> 
> **IMPORTANT:** Starting this chapter, this story will branch out into two different routes. Be warned: the alternate route is rated ‘E’, and may contain disturbing themes. Individual warnings are posted each chapter.
> 
> You can skip it if you’re bothered by that, but if you aren’t, then I encourage you to try reading them both. Each route reveals different secrets and perspectives. :)
> 
> [Chapter 3: Alternate Route](http://vioxxin.tumblr.com/post/132303616982/bloodsport-chapter-32)

The call that comes in is for a fire.

 

They arrive at the scene of a murder.

 

* * *

 

They call it miraculous, the way he was found. By the time the fire trucks had arrived, the house was almost entirely devoured by flames. It was protocol that coerced the rescue men to barge in through the last door in the hallway, and they are glad they did.

 

Hide is led away from the fire, unharmed and unsinged.

 

His parents’ bodies are carted away shortly thereafter, the unnatural fist-sized hole in his father’s chest enough to warrant a call for the police. His mother, just barely alive, is loaded into the ambulance beside him where the EMTs work to stabilize her.

 

He stares at her body unblinkingly, numb. One of the firemen had given him a safety blanket when he was first carried out and he curls his fists tighter in its folds, wraps it closer around his body as if simulating an embrace.

 

Before they leave, he picks up the panicked murmurs of the crowd edging the police tape. He recognizes their neighbors, dark-eyed and pajama-clad, drawn in by the chaos caused by the arrival of the fire trucks, ambulance, and police. They look at him, pity stark in their eyes as he reaches out to touch his mother’s hand, pale and dangling from the side of the table.

 

_“Poor child. His father is dead, and now his mother might be next too.”_

* * *

 

“At least he’s still alive.”

 

It’s hot. Cold fingers skim over Hide’s forehead and he stirs, confusion addling his brain as he tries to piece the jagged memories in his mind together, his eyes twitching open at the light that hits it.

 

_‘There was an attack...fire..broke out. Guy...died. And then…’_

_**[“...possibility of a trauma...”]** _

__

It hurts to open his eyes. It’s hard and it hurts and all he seems to see is black.

 

_‘And then?’_

_**[He is met by a mask with a large, lipless grin,]** _

__

“Oh look, I think he’s waking up.”

 

**_[and a single]_ **

****

“Tch. It’s about time.”

 

**_[burning]_ **

****

He opens his eyes.

 

The room is on fire.

 

_**[eye.]** _

__

“Wake up!”

 

“GET AWAY FROM ME!” Hide shoots up and swings at the person beside him, his body rushing with adrenaline as his mind is filled with images of blood and fire, and _that grin, that **ghoul**_ -

 

“Oh!”

 

“What the hell?”

 

“Calm down, you moron!” Thin, yet strong fingers grab his wrist in a vice grip, halting his fist. His other hand is immediately held down and Hide panics, violently thrashing as the feeling of ice starts to dig deep into his wrist, familiar yet unwelcome.

 

“Let me go! LET ME-”

 

_Smack!_

The sound echoes loudly in the room, overrides the sharp ringing that once filled his ears. His assailants’ hands have let go, so Hide hesitantly touches his cheek, confused at the heat that meets his fingertips.

 

“Wha…?”

 

“Are you actually awake now or do you want a fucking encore?”

 

_‘That voice…’_

Hide’s vision clears, the hellish red hues fading from the edges, and he meets the shocked faces of Touka, Irimi, and Koma. From the way she is still clenching her hands, Hide guesses Touka had been the one dealing with him.

 

His shoulders fall, the weight of his worries gone at the realization that he is _here_.

 

_‘With them.’_

“... Hi guys,” he tries, throat dry, “Am I… in trouble?”

 

“You idiot!” Touka screams, leaping forward to clutch the front of his shirt in her hands, “Do you have any idea how worried we were?”

 

Hide winces at the close proximity of her face (‘this is not the time to think of your crush’) and attempts a shaky smile, “I… guess I am, then?”

 

He guesses by the angry red hue of her cheeks (and Koma’s low whistle) that it is not the right answer.

 

Perhaps aware of it herself, Irimi lays a hand on Touka’s shoulder to catch her attention, “That’s enough. Put him down, Touka-chan,” she says soothingly.

 

Touka begrudgingly releases him, but the anger in her face refuses to leave (along with a small, secret emotion Hide likes to think is concern).

 

_[“I knew it. I knew we never should have sent you there.” she mutters lowly.]_

“How do you feel, Hide-kun?” Irimi asks.

 

“Great, actually!” he chirps, “Thanks for taking care of me. Although if you don’t mind me asking, how exactly did I get here? The last thing I remember was fainting in the CCG.”

 

A pause.

 

“Yeah, about that,” Koma says slowly, “We were wondering if you would tell us about it too. It was actually kind of strange, how we found you.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Allow me to answer that,” Everyone turns to the door as the manager walks in, a hint of a frown on his face.

 

"Yoshimura-san, you're here?" Hide says in surprise, "Who's tending to the shop?"

 

“We closed it down for the day,” he replies, raising a hand when Hide’s expression morphs to one of guilt, “Don’t worry. Everybody agreed to do it. We were more concerned for you when we heard that the CCG had been attacked while you were there. It was too distracting, so we decided it would be for the best to close shop for a while. During that time, someone had rung the doorbell. Imagine our surprise when we found you outside.”

 

“Someone...brought me here? Who?”

 

“I’m afraid that’s something I can not answer,” The manager says as a kind smile finds its way to his face, “Although we’re also curious, I suppose it’s enough that they brought you back, safe and sound.”

 

“Barely looked like you were in a fire,” Koma remarks, “Real lucky of you, honestly.”

 

_[like a miracle]_

Hide smiles thinly, “Yeah. I guess you’re right.”

 

* * *

 

“I heard you were caught in the raid the other day.”

 

It’s morning. Anteiku is filled with a quiet, sleepy atmosphere that feels almost homey. The light that streams through the windows lends the cafe a dreamy allure and highlights the warmth the azaleas bring with their petals, pretty and pink.

 

Hide strokes the one on the counter, “So I guess that explains these, huh? What was it again? _Take care of yourself for me_?”

 

Hide inwardly preens at the mildly surprised look on Naoki’s face.

 

“Yes,” Naoki replies, “I must admit, I was curious when I saw that Anteiku was closed. I managed to find out about your condition when I tried to visit one time, and overheard the others talk about the raid.”

 

“Oh, I see,” Hide says, forcing himself to suppress the nagging suspicion in the back of his mind, “That’s pretty nice of you, though I didn’t think you’d care about Anteiku all that much. Aren’t there like a million other coffee shops you can visit around here? I mean, you’re an editor, you probably have a list available whenever your favorite one closes.”

 

Naoki hums, “Yes. But then they wouldn’t have you.”

 

Hide coughs loudly, irritated at the heat that floods his cheeks and the embarrassment that continues to rear its ugly head whenever Naoki gifts him with one of his gems.

 

_‘Stupid literature nerds and their stupidly lethal way with words.’_

“... escaped?”

 

“Excuse me?” Hide asks, shaking his head, “Sorry I didn’t catch that.”

 

“I was simply wondering: how exactly did you escape?”

 

“Oh! That. Um,” How did he escape? As far as he and everyone else in Anteiku knew, he fainted (probably because of smoke inhalation), was rescued, and then anonymously dropped onto the cafe’s doorstep.

 

He says so to Naoki, who cocks an eyebrow questioningly.

 

“Don’t you find any of that strange? Let’s say someone did rescue you- why didn’t they take you to a hospital? How would they know to take you to Anteiku? How did they manage to escape the ghouls that were said to have caused the attack? And why would they save you specifically?”

 

These are all questions Hide has entertained ever since he woke up, ones his mind have offered numerous explanations for that he has sifted and sorted through.

  
  


**Why didn’t they take you to a hospital?**

“Maybe they thought I didn’t need it?”

 

_Wait, no. That’s stupid._

_Then maybe they couldn’t go… because it was a public place? Because they would be questioned?_

**How would they know to take you to Anteiku?**

“Because of the uniform, duh.”

 

_But still. Why would they take me to my work place? If they didn’t wanna go to the hospital, and they didn’t wanna leave me in the building, and they didn’t wanna deal with me, why not just drop me off at my apartment? My address was in my wallet!_

_Because they knew there would be someone there to take care of me?_

**How did they manage to escape the ghouls that were said to have caused the attack?**

“They’re ridiculously good at sneaking?”

 

_Or they had experience. They knew what they were dealing with._

_And they had the strength to deal with it._

**And why would they save you specifically?**

“I was obviously a helpless civilian, and maybe even the first one they saw?”

 

_Or, they knew me._

__  
  


Hide feels ridiculous at his excuses, knows by the quirk in his smile that Naoki is thinking the same thing. Still, he doesn’t dare entertain the other answers, not when adding them all up gave him only one response.

 

_‘A ghoul knows me. And it saved me.’_

“You know, Takatsuki is working on another novel lately,” Naoki says out of the blue. Hide stares at him, wondering what this has to do with him, but nods politely anyway, “She says she wants to write about ghouls. I accompanied her to the CCG to get some material, but they were sorely disappointing. Their perspective was limited and predictable, unfit for a potential protagonist.”

 

_‘Could it have been him?’_

“Oh. Really.” Hide says, “Let me guess: they just think all ghouls are mindless, sadistic monsters?”

 

Naoki eyes him, a thin smile creeping on his lips, “I wonder, do you think the same? Tell me now, how do you feel about ghouls?”

 

“Me? Well-”

 

_‘Why would he do that?’_

“I guess I can’t really answer that, since I’ve never met one!” Hide laughs.

 

“Would you like too?”

 

_‘Why?’_

“Why not? We can have coffee together, just like a date! I’ll order some takeout, and he can eat the delivery guy!” Hide babbles, standing up and scooting away from the counter as a woman waves him in, “Well, this has been interesting, but I really need to work now. Thanks for the _stimulating_ conversation, Naoki-san! See you!” he waves, dashing away in a flurry of orange and brown.

 

“... See you, Hide.”

 

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

 

_‘This can’t be happening.’_

It’s midnight, or close to it. Hide stands by the door to his bedroom, one hand on the light switch and another with a knife, as he holds the gaze of the ghoul standing outside his balcony window.

 

“You know, I was just kidding, right?” he calls out. The knife in his hand twitches as the ghoul walks forward, gently placing a hand on the window’s surface.

 

The white hair. That fucking creepy mask.

 

It’s him.

 

_[his knees are shaking. it hurts to breathe. he can’t do this. he can’t he can’t he **can’t]**_

“Why are you here?” Hide demands. Then he hears it.

 

_drip. drip._

_drip._

It’s midnight, or close to it. The neighborhood is silent in sleep, and the drops of his blood echo loud and clear.

 

The ghoul is hurt.

 

“...Are you asking for help?” Hide asks, voice small.

 

He could do it. The wound looks non-fatal, even with the blood. He is a Pre-Med student after all.

 

_‘Not that this ghoul should know that.’_

The ghoul only inclines his head, that single burning eye focused entirely on him. Hide tries to take a step back but his knees only knock together and send him sprawling to the ground. The knife clatters, and he grabs for it in a panic, looking up to see the ghoul staring at him in silence.

 

This is incredibly stupid and dangerous. Hide should just call the CCG right now.

 

_‘But… he saved me, didn’t he?’_

“Idiot, who can say that for sure?” Hide mutters.

 

_‘But he was the only one there. He could have killed you then. But he didn’t.’_

Silence. Hide hesitates, then looks again.

 

The ghoul is still there. Silent. Bleeding.

 

“Oh God,” Hide breathes, “Touka-chan is right. I _am_ an idiot.”

 

* * *

 

The moment he takes off his shirt, all thoughts of Touka are pushed to the side in favor of ogling the ( _‘chiseled fucking **abs** \- this is so unfair!’_) large wound covering the ghoul’s side. Hide snaps out of his trance long enough to slip into another one- a professional demeanor he seamlessly adopts as he works to treat the wound.

 

“That should do it,” he says, carefully patting the bandaged area. The ghoul stays silent throughout the time, and Hide can’t decide if it is relieving or unnerving. Nevertheless, he makes up for the lack of words as he always does, rambling on and on about medical lingo and observations as he treated him.

 

Now though, he can’t find any words to say. The wound is treated, his job is done, and yet the ghoul won’t leave.

 

“Will-”

 

Suddenly, it stands up. Hide yelps as the ghoul walks past him, scolds himself for being careless enough to believe that it had any good intentions or that, by some reason or another, it wouldn’t murder him.

 

_‘Great! As thanks for treating a fucking ghoul, you get to be eaten to preserve the intelligence of the human race. Bravo, Hide.’_

“No shit. Crap. You can still make it. Just do what you should’ve done in the first place and call the CCG-!”

 

Hide is cut off by the sound of glass breaking.

 

Surprised, he cautiously follows the sound to his kitchen and finds nothing but a broken window, and a steaming cup of coffee.

 

* * *

 

Months pass.

 

Hide doesn’t meet the ghoul again.

 

Naoki, though, is always there.

 

* * *

 

It’s dawn, too early to rise for anyone who didn’t own a business. This time, Touka has finals to attend to, so Hide finds himself at the helm once again.

 

He’s alone at the counter, wondering whether or not he could get away with skipping class this night, when the bell suddenly rings.

 

“Oh sorry, we’re still clo-”

 

They’re white this time. If he weren’t already so accustomed to identifying them, Hide might even say they were roses.

 

(They’re not though, and it annoys him (excites him) to think there are still many he doesn’t know of.)

 

He’s moving even before he knows it, and carefully takes the weight from his arms.

 

“Good morning, Hayate,” Hide smiles.

 

He doesn’t know when this started- doesn’t know how he has grown so used to calling Naoki by his first name. Doesn’t know how he has grown so used to greeting him with a smile derived from genuine pleasure.

 

“Good morning, Hide.”

 

He wonders too, if Naoki knows how he has grown to return these smiles without the ice (the mystery) that usually accompanies them. Wonders if he knows he has dimples when he truly and honestly smiles.

 

Hide wonders if he knows how beautiful they are now.

 

“Would you like to go on a date with me this weekend?”

 

* * *

 

Even in winter, Anteiku radiates an aura of warmth. It is something Irimi has always loved and taken comfort in, quietly pleased when the customers mention it.

 

Still, the warmth that it holds this particular day is different. Somehow, it is far more soothing, more open, more welcoming, and bright.

 

She spots Hide by the corner of her eye, a dream outlined in the very curves of his face, and thinks she might know why.

 

“Oh, how delightful. What beautiful flowers you have here.”

 

Irimi looks down from her pad to see her customer admiring the flowers on the tables, “Oh thank you. They were a gift.”

 

The woman grins, a twinkle in her eye, “A gift, you say? My. Do you know what it means?”

 

“Ah, no. What is it?”

 

“These gorgeous flowers right here are called gardenias. They are given to tell the recipient:

 

* * *

 

_“I think I’m falling in love with you.”_

* * *

 

Out of irony, their first date is in a coffee shop.

 

Hide almost feels like a traitor at how many cakes he ordered, but figures he gets a free pass for his first date (besides, it’s not like the guys at Anteiku have to know). Also, Naoki obviously seems to take pleasure in seeing him enjoy himself so much, so he lets himself have fun just to keep that smile alive.

 

“So how’s the book coming along?” he asks. There’s a slight pause as Naoki stares at him, then chuckles, grabbing his napkin to dab at the corner of Hide’s mouth (who is definitely not blushing fifty shades of red right now).

 

“You make me feel like I’m dating a child,” Naoki teases. Hide pouts.

 

“It’s going well,” he answers, “She is simply a little stuck on the ending. Not that I blame her. It is the hardest part to write, next to the beginning.”

 

“So what’s it gonna be? A happy ending, or a tragic one?” Hide asks curiously, eyes wide and attentive.

 

“Honestly Hide. I don’t know either. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.”

 

* * *

 

After downing about three cups of ‘coffee’ (read: sugar with a little bit of coffee mixed in), Hide predictably excuses himself to go to the restroom. He aims to take care of it quickly, excited at the prospect of spending more time on this date, but Fate is a downer and curses him with an unnaturally long wait for the single, unisex restroom.

 

(It was diarrhea. Of course it was.)

 

He already has an excuse on the tip of his tongue, a skip in his step as he goes back to their table. He is just so happy to be here that the sudden downfall of his mood is jarring enough to make him stop in his tracks.

 

There’s a guy there. There’s another guy sitting before Naoki and making him smile.

 

He’s gorgeous too- with his purple hair, slender face, and high cheekbones. Even if that suit is the tackiest thing Hide has ever seen in his life, he wears it so perfectly and elegantly that it’s almost unfair.

 

(And at least he’s wearing a suit. The closest thing Hide has to formal wear is a t-shirt with a tuxedo printed on it.)

 

He and Naoki complement each other perfectly, both so beautiful, and elegant, and cultured.

 

Hide debates the risk of leaving. Before he can make a decision, Naoki looks up, catches his eye, and beams.

 

(And oh, it’s so gorgeous, even purple man has to stop and look at what he’s smiling at.)

 

_‘It’s me. He’s smiling at me.’_ Hide thinks.

 

“I have to go now,” he hears Naoki says. The purple man murmurs something in a foreign language almost panickedly, but Naoki ignores him, his eyes focused entirely on Hide. And though it makes him feel selfish, Hide is glad to know that.

 

(Let him be selfish, just for this moment.)

 

“You took your time,” Naoki says the moment they meet. He slips his hand into Hide’s, their fingers a comfortable fit, and Hide flushes with pleasure at the thought.

 

“Sorry. This place only has one bathroom and someone decided to have diarrhea in it,” he explains, “So, should we go?”

 

* * *

 

It’s how you end a date, right?

 

He leans in, eyes halfway shut. Naoki follows him, a hand coming to cup his cheek as their lips finally meet.

 

Through the haze, Hide can only think of one thing:

 

_‘He tastes like mint and coffee.’_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> somebody catch that foreshadowing for me pls thx

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! To anyone who is following “Sun Seekers”, I’m sorry if I haven’t been able to update it yet. I really did intend to finish it the week after I posted the second chapter but I got busier than expected. It’s not easy moving to an entirely different country. D:
> 
> On the other hand, once I finally found the time to write it down, I got too distracted thinking about this other idea, so I decided to just get it out of the way first. I enjoyed writing this a lot, so I hope you enjoy reading it too!
> 
> p.s: don’t worry. this won’t be too long. i’m bad at doing that. o:  
> p.p.s: the mask mentioned above is the one kaneki wore in the oneshot.  
> p.p.p.s: yes, mr. naoki is kaneki. it's not really supposed to be a secret. (◕‿◕✿) 


End file.
